I am sooooooooooo incredibly FRUSTRATED!!!! You see those t-shirts at the race expo booths that say “this seemed like a good idea 3 months ago?”, yeah this marathon seemed like a really good idea 3 months ago. I will admit that it is quite possible that a glass of wine or two may have lead to the sense of false confidence that I could possibly run 42.2km. I say this because I ran 8km yesterday…and I was MISERABLE. I spent the whole run in pain. This is a new concept for me because I LOVE running, like I mean LOVE. It is a part of who I have defined myself as a person. For goodness sake I have 3 tattoos on my body that speak to my love affair with the sport! I have never disliked short runs as much as I do right now. The long ones seem managable after I loosen within 2km, but the short ones are extremely uncomfortable.
I was incredibly hopefully after shockwave therapy with my left quad feeling better. Then I ran on Sunday. All of a sudden my right hip flexor went…gone…shot..like hurts sometimes to put weight on it. Had a good stretch at the physio, took about 4 days off because I accidentally ran 2km too much, and then headed out last night. My disclaimer is that I am clearly not stretching enough, and I don’t have my foam roller, so I think these are two significant contributing factors. I know it has nothing to do with my mileage because I haven’t been running much due to injuries. I just feel so utterly mentally fatigued, and completely disillusioned. When I envisioned training and running for my first marathon this was not how it was suppose to be. I was riding on the high from my successful training run at Around the Bay, and got a PB in my half this year. I wanted to feel good, and look good. Clearly this has not been the case. Yet I will plug away at it because I know that I will not permanently hurt myself (my physio has given me the go ahead), and it is a life goal for me. The question that remains is will I ever want to do it again?
For those that know me, they are inevitably shaking their heads, YES! of course you’ll do one again! They would be correct. Mostly because I am an overachiever and I will keep doing it till I get it right. But also because I never back down from a challenge. That rebellious teen with the counter will? Comes in handy as a runner 😉
Have a great weekend folks, off to the cottage again tonight and gearing up for 36km this weekend. Here’s a sneak peak of one of my running tattoos and the meaning behind it. I got this tattoo after my first half marathon (Chilly half). It is written in Lithuanian which is where my grandfather was from. He always had a really strong work ethic, and I have always thought that as runners we need this work ethic too! I hope I got it from him 🙂 It says “run into peace” in english, and hitting the road is definitely peace for me.